All Posts Tagged with "scarecrow"

Jun 9

Love among the lettuces

The day finally came.

A tall dark handsome stranger appeared at the allotments, on a plot a mere stone’s throw from our own.


May 26

Protection racket

In memory of my Dad… All the scarecrows at our allotments are male. A stuffed character from the animation South Park, for example, is hoisted aloft by a pole up the jacksie. The pole is a sturdy broom handle so when the wind blows, nothing moves. It’s hard to see how it would scare birds, […]


Apr 7

Scarecrow lovers part IV

So much has happened down at the allotment since I last posted that I hardly know where to begin. The last we saw of head-scarved Harry, he was ashen-faced and coke-addled following his bodged gender reassignment. The Lady of Shallot was disembodied in the shed, dreaming of a handsome hobby-horse-boy she’d glimpsed on another plot. […]


Aug 22

Love among the leeks part III

Remember allotment lovers Harry and the Lady of Shallot?  Theirs was a thwarted union, partly because of their broomstick bodies and sponge ball heads. It was also because an allotment neighbour in the grip of a fantasy about juicy cukes erected a poly tunnel between them. I held out hope for the foiled pair. It […]


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