Mandy Sutter, Writer

So much is happening down at the allotments that I hardly know where to begin. The last we saw of head-scarved Harry, he was ashen-faced and coke-addled following his botched gender reassignment. The Lady of Shallot was disembodied in the shed, dreaming of a handsome hobby-horse person she’d glimpsed on another plot. Harry and Shally’s […]

The romance between scarecrow lovers Harry and the Lady of Shallot was blighted from the get-go.  Then our allotment neighbour, in the grip of a fantasy about juicy cukes, erected a massive poly tunnel between them. Nevertheless, I have held out hope for the foiled pair. It is windy at our allotments and I’ve hoped […]

The day finally came.

A tall dark handsome stranger appeared at the allotments, on a plot a mere stone’s throw from our own.

In memory of my Dad… All the scarecrows at our allotments are male. A stuffed character from the animation South Park, for example, is hoisted aloft by a pole up the jacksie. The pole is a sturdy broom handle so when the wind blows, nothing moves. It’s hard to see how it would scare birds, […]